Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Explaining LOST - Some Like It Hoth

“Some Like It Hoth”


What? There’s a new LOST in a handful of hours and there was even a whole extra week to work on this and NOW I’m sending this out there. Yep.

So this week was a Miles episode. This was pretty obvious by the Miles flashback scene. A young Asian kid asks his mom for some change for the vending machine while they are trying to buy a lousy apartment. We know this is Miles because her mother says “No running, Miles!” She then proceeds to look directly at the character and explain this is Miles Strom from the island, but he is much younger. Finally we all understand. So Miles goes and checks out the vending machine, but is interrupted. He has images a dead body flash into his mind and he is drawn to the #4 room. (LOST number). He somehow knows that a key was under a stone bunny. This show loves bunnies. So young Miles cries out when sees a dead dude. His mom and the landlord comes. Then Miles decides to be really creepy and starts freaking out how he can hear the dead boy talk to him.

Flash to the island in 1977 where Sawyer and Kate are now leaving the Hostile territory. Now it’s been a few weeks. They just handed over Ben to Richard so Ben can take him to the Temple to get all better. So they are returning to Dharma town but Sawyer calls up Miles and tells him to destroy the security footage of them leaving with Ben. Sawyer says he’s now off the grid “looking” for Ben. Miles is about to destroy the tape when Horace walks in. Horace needs Sawyer but settles for Miles. He’s supposed to give a package to Radzinsky and deliver a package back. He has to go into Hostile territory to do this. He gets into his (Ooo ooo) Dharma bus and finds Radzinsky being his usual spastic self. I look at him and realize this is what would happen if Needlenose Ned from Groundhogs Day had a rougher childhood. So he gives Miles this dead body who “fell into a ditch.” Looking at the bullet hole in his head, Miles asks if the ditch had a gun. Alas, Radzinsky is not one for small talk. The body bag is loaded up and Miles is sent on his way, but he has one thing to do first. He opens up the bag and asks the corpse what really happened.

We flash back to Miles’s youth once again. He is a teenager or in his 20s with a very punk rock vibe with spiky hair and a whole lot of piercings. There are actually 108 piercings on his head. Don’t bother to count; just believe me. So he’s visiting his very sick mother. She’s dying and he wants to know about his past, specifically how he can talk to dead people and how she won’t talk about his dad. She says that his father is dead and he kicked them out when Miles was a baby. Miles wants to see his dad’s body and his mom said the body is in a place he can never go.

Ironic flash back to Miles on the island where he is waiting for Horace to get off the phone. Horace mentions that the death may be caused by electromagnetisms, which was the man focus for the Swan station or what everyone simply causes the Hatch. Now remember this is being built right now; it’s what Radzinsky was building a model for. Horace says that Miles now needs to take the package to Pierre Chang, the dude from all of the orientation videos. Miles walks out and sees Hurley is filling up the (Ooo ooo) Dharma bus full of sandwiches for everyone at the Orchid, which is where Miles is going. Hurley says they should car pool so maybe they can stop global warming, which further proves he still doesn’t get time travel.

Meanwhile Juliet and Kate catch up at the little hospital thing. Then Roger Linus walks in and notices that his dying son is no where to be seen. Juliet says that he has disappeared. Roger freaks out and starts yelling and then runs off to security. Then Juliet looks at Kate and says “Here we go.” So is this it? Is this the beginning of the end for them at Dharma town? Sure looks like it.

So Miles and Hurley are driving while Hurley is writing frantically in a journal. He asks how to spell “bounty hunter” and Miles asks if it is a memoir. Hurley won’t budge. They keep driving and then Hurley is upset about the foul smell in the car. He thinks it’s his sandwiches but when he goes to look he finds the dead body. Hurley asks what happened and Miles tells him that a filling in this man’s tooth flew out of its socket and went through his brain. First off, whoa. Second off, one of the coolest death concepts ever. Hurley figures out that Miles talks to dead people and he says he will keep his secret because he can talk to them too.

Flashback to Miles more around the age we know him now. He’s talking from a guy from the TV show Breaking Bad. The man has hired Miles to talk to his dead son and let him know that he loved him. Miles says he needs a body, but apparently the kid was cremated. He goes through some motions but the audience knows it to be fake. Miles says to the man that his son knew he loved him. Then as Miles is leaving, Naomi shows up! Oh come on, you all remember Naomi. She parachuted onto the island in Season Three from the freighter. Locke killed her, you know, because. She wants to talk to Miles.

Back in 1977, Roger is drinking beer on a kid’s playground, which I have recently discovered is still a crime today. What do you know. So Kate sits next to him and tries to give him a boost of confidence. He should have hope and whatnot. Roger starts to get rightfully paranoid and tells her to get out of there.

Meanwhile the best road trip duo ever are still driving. They are debating each other’s ability. Miles is shocked that Hurley can have long friendly conversations with dead people. Hurley gets the line of the night with “You’re just jealous that my power is better than yours.” This is what those X-Men movies should be like. Wait, the actor who played Miles was in X3. Oh what a terrible movie that was and—Oh they’re at the Orchid. The construction is underway. There is a lot of framework done and Pierre Chang seems to be in charge of stuff. Chang walks over and yells at Miles for not coming alone. Then he threatens to demote Hurley to picking up polar bear poop if he breathes one word of this. Hurley tells Miles that guy was a douche and of course Miles says that douche is his dad. I hate it when that happens.

Back in whenever, Naomi takes Miles to a dead body for an audition. She tosses him some cash and then Miles tells her what happened to him. Apparently this guy died on his way to Widmore with all of this info about empty graves and a purchase order for an airplane. Now remember this mystery. We have a fake Oceanic 815 plane in the bottom of the ocean and a bunch of fake graves for this flight. Now Widmore says that Ben made the fake plane and Ben says that Widmore did it. We still don’t know the truth. Naomi says that she is leading an expedition to an island and they need to find a man on that island. One way to find him is to ask the countless bodies on the island to where Ben’s hiding. Then she offers him 1.6 million dollars. 16 is a LOST number and also this makes sense now. Miles asked Ben for 3.2 for a counter arrangement and of course he just doubled the asking price.  Another pressing mystery solved. Next?

Back in 1977, Hurley wants to talk about Pierre Chang. Miles doesn’t. Yet Chang needs a ride to Radzinsky so off the three of them go again. Meanwhile Jack is cleaning up a classroom when Roger walks in. Roger wants to clean in order to distract him or something. Either way he threw a bucket of water again. This has been two episodes now when he’s made the room messier. This guy is the worst janitor ever. Jack cleaned up a chalkboard with mysterious Egyptian stuff on it and is about to leave when Roger asks him about Kate. He doesn’t trust her and thinks she has something to do with his kid’s disappearance. He asks Jack for advice and Jack simply says lie low.

Back in the (Ooo ooo) Dharma Bus, Hurley is asking Chang some stuff. He keeps getting Chang to talk about Miles and just about anything in general. Miles and Chang find it annoying especially when Hurley tries to get the three of them to get a beer later. They stop the van before they can say no so they can go to a secret location. Chang leaves to talk to Radzinsky and Hurley realizes where they are. He sees two Dharma construction workers filing some numbers onto a hatch door. Yep, it’s 4 8 15 16 23 42, which we see a whole lot of times throughout Seasons One and Two. Hurley tells Miles they are building the hatch that ultimately crashed their plane. Remember Desmond didn’t press the button in time one day and made the plane crash. I hate it when that happens.

Back in Miles’s past, he’s kidnapped after ordering a fish taco. A dude named Bram, who we actually know, kidnaps him. He was one of the guys on Ajira Flight 316. Ben didn’t kill him. Anywho, he tries to convince Miles not to get on that freighter. He asks Miles that question again “What lies in the shadow of the statue?” Now Lapidus didn’t know the answer and neither does Miles. By not knowing the answer, Bram says Miles shouldn’t go to the island. He says he if he agrees not to go, they will tell him all about his ability and his father. Miles gets grumpy and says he doesn’t care about that stuff anymore and asks for 3.2 million dollars. Bram and the boys toss him out of the van and then reminds him he’s on the wrong end.

Back in 1977, Miles and Hurley are driving back. Hurley tells Miles some things about the hatch. How there will be an accident and how they will have to build a computer to stop the world from ending. Foreshadowing! Back to the father issues, though. Hurley says this is fantastic that Chang is here for now Miles can actually get to know his father or be able to change his own diaper. Miles gets angry and says he doesn’t care about his father. He grabs Hurley’s journal to read what’s going on his head. Miles reads it and it’s the screenplay for The Empire Strikes Back. Yes! Hurley says that this is 1977 and Star Wars just came out. He figures George Lucas will be looking for a sequel and he figured he can help with a few changes from the original movie. 

Back in Dharmaville, Sawyer has returned to Juliet. Yet Jack is there too. Jack is there to pass on the news that Roger suspects Kate. Sawyer is grateful for being filled in. Then Phil walks up to Sawyer saying he knows who took Ben. He pulls out the tape Miles forgot to destroy and says it was Sawyer. So Phil decides to be a complete idiot and walks into Sawyer’s house before telling anyone else. So Sawyer punches him and tells Juliet to get some rope. And there it goes.

Back in Miles’s past he returns to the man from Breaking Bad to return the money. He admits to lying and says that if he should have let his son know that he loved him when he was still alive. Oh daddy issues.

Back in 1977, Hurley tells Miles the story of how he used to hate his dad but now they are the best of friends and he misses them. Miles still says no. Then Hurley says that was Luke Skywalker’s position too. He could have sat down and talked to Vader but instead he lost his hand. Hurley also throws in a jab against Ewoks, but Miles got the message. He walks over to Chang’s house to see him reading a book to Baby Miles. Yes it’s a picture book about polar bears. Of course it is. Big boy Miles starts to cry at the sight. He tries to walk away but Chang comes out needing a ride to the dock. The sub is back with scientists from Ann Arbor, which is where Dharma was created. Yet who gets off the sub? Daniel Faraday. 


Yes! Faraday returns! This upcoming episode is all about him and from what I can tell…it’s going to be one nutty episode. This will be the 100th hour of LOST, which is always a milestone for any TV show. Yet it’s also airing on the 100th day of President Obama’s term in office. Hmmmm. Is there a connection? Of course there is. Obama is Jacob. You heard it here first.

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