The following text messages took place between 2:25AM and 3:30AM on June 4th. Spoilers from Season Two.
Austin: Finished Game of Thrones. Very awesome. Great last scene.
Pedro: That’s what I was talking about, we had seen the white walkers before, but now we saw the true king beyond the wall.
Pedro: Speaking of…
Pedro: I think Jon Snow will end up true King Beyond the Wall, whatever that brings.
Pedro: And the dragons were awesome. When it was done I was thought wow, how easy.
Pedro: And Arya’s wolf still lives presumably, and she should definitely have joined the Faceless Men.
Pedro: And I mean not white walker for Jon Snow, but new/final king beyond the wall.
Pedro: And then the north will be tamed and Dany and Bran will wed and their daughter/son will be lord of dragon and wolf and Dany’s child will still be the Station who mounts the world and there will be peace and happiness for all til the end of time.
Pedro: And Ayra will have her wolf back and become Bad Ass Assassin No. 1, and rule the world.
Pedro: And kill Joffrey and Cersei and all the bad people.
Pedro: Except the good ones.
Austin: And Robb’s army kills all of them.
Austin: IT WILL HAPPEN
Pedro: He lives happily ever after with his new wife on a farm raising turnips.
Pedro: And little cows and horses and sheep.
Pedro: And little carrots and children and little direwolves and dragons and little assassins and little mages.
Pedro: And be foster family to the world and its little critters.
Pedro: all on a super quaint, cozy little farmhouse
Pedro: on their own little island.
Austin: UNTIL STANNIS BREAKS OUT AND KILLS THEM ALL!!!
Pedro: AND NO MORE KILLING AND WAR
Pedro: NO MORE!
Pedro: HE’S ONE OF THE BAD PEOPLE!
Pedro: HE WILL HAVE BEEN KILLED BY ONE OF THESE PEOPLE
Austin: No more giants waging war. Can’t we just pursue our lives with our children and our wives ‘ til that happy day arrives? How can we ignore… [Editor’s note: Austin decided to quote the musical Into the Woods out of his own amusement, to mess with Pedro and because this is now 3AM.]
Pedro: IT WILL BE HORRIBLE AND AMAZING
Pedro: OR ALL OF THEM AT ONCE
Pedro: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? ALL THE BAD PEOPLE WILL DIE!!!
Austin: You okay?
Pedro: …and they lived happily ever after.
Pedro: Oh, and Tyrion will be president.
Austin: Tyrion sides with the Lannisters. He is a bad person. He would be killed.
Pedro: HE’S NOT A BAD PERSON.
Austin: He fought for Joffrey and defends his throne. His a bad guy. He wants to kill the Starks.
Pedro: YOU’RE A BAD PERSON
Pedro: YOU WANT GOOD PEOPLE TO DIE
Austin: And you are my friend. YOU’RE A BAD PERSON
Austin: You play the game of thrones, you win or you die. No ties.
Pedro: HE DOESN’T
Pedro: SO HE
Austin: Nope. Dany wins. He can’t win too. He dies.
Pedro: No, he’s not playing anymore. Daddy said so.
Austin: He won’t leave the city. He’s still playing.
Pedro: BUT HE NEEDS TO HE JUST SAID
Pedro: AND THAT’S WHY HE’S PRESIDENT
Austin: He will die. Bran and Dany and Robb don’t like him. Dead.
Pedro: He can play all day and it won’t mean anything.
Pedro: …YEAH THEY DO
Pedro: he have Bran a seat, and helped Robb’s crippled little brother.
Pedro: And Dany only hates the Usurper and maybe Tywin for killing the king’s childr…Oh.
Pedro: HE LIVES!
Austin: Until Joffrey’s new fiancé stabs him before Dany can return to Westeros.
Pedro: Don’t call George yet.
Pedro: OH SHIT I FORGOT ABOUT HER
Pedro: I HAVE CLASS
End of Transmission